My gf and I have been together over 10yrs. For the past 3 or 4 years we have been spending more and more time with her dad and stepmom because we moved close to where they live. Her family is great and we get along well. Her dad isn't a total alpha but he's pretty cool. Plays in a band, puts himself first, doesn't give many fucks. He fails the occasional shit test but who doesn’t. Me and him hang out a lot while my gf and her step mom do their thing.
Her family has been buying me these goofy joke t-shirts lately that they think are hilarious. I only wear them around her family to make them happy. So a couple weeks ago I go over there and me and her dad are wearing the exact same thing and basically look just like each other. It was funny and no one cared but the resemblance was striking and I definitely noticed. He's in rough shape from a lot of beer drinking, so I guess I'm like a younger more fit version. Anyway, I always heard that girls want to bang their dad's but never really knew if it was true. I didn't know them well for the first 5 or 6 years we were together so it never clicked. They also say all guys want to bang their moms but if my gf was anything like my mom I would puke all over her tits. Has anyone else noticed this? Do you guys think it's a good or a bad thing? Is it something I should play up or play down? I know it's a weird and stupid question but I'm sure there's something to this. Just interested in what you guys think.
Look, the basic transaction is attention for sex. Men trade attention for sex. Every type of male-female interaction follows this. Little boys tease the girls they actually like the most. High school boys tolerate a shitty rom-com movie to get a hand job in the back seat. College boys put in the time to throw keggers so the cute sorority girls come by.
Pretty straightforward, although it's not intuitive to a lot of men. We get worked up a lot more about sex than attention. When a high school girl blows half the football team, we sigh and try and fix what must be low self esteem. When a high school boy spends all his time with girls who "only likes him as a friend," we just tell him it's OK, he's "marriage material" and those girls are just not ready yet.
So here's the thing. A woman's dad is the only male in her life who gives her attention for something else besides sex.
So say he's a hardass financially. When she saves money, he's happy. When she buys stupid shit, he's disappointed. She wants dad's positive attention, she better learn how to be frugal or have a good job.
She he's a joker. All about the dad jokes. He makes a corny joke, she laughs, he's happy. He makes a corny joke, she calls him corny, he stops joking with her. She learns if someone is trying to be funny, politely laughing is better than saying "stop trying to be funny."
So she will seek these non-sexual behaviors in their romantic relationships. She got used to doing X for daddy's attention, she'll feel most comfortable with guys who also like X.
I did not physically resemble my wife's dad at all, but we had some bizarrely similar traits. A lot of the same idiosyncrasies, pet peeves, that sort of thing. That wasn't why my wife wanted to fuck me, but outside of fucking, outside of the "attention for sex" dynamic, what's happening?
You don't have to wear the corny t-shirts, but if you grumped and said, "those t-shirts are so dumb," she would probably be conflicting to her. She's used to her dad reacting with positive attention to those t-shirts, it's unfamiliar to be with a man who reacts with negative attention.
Just realize it's very much non-sexual and if anything, just means your wife learned that there is sometimes more a woman can do to get a man's positive attention than offer her Vagina. This is why dating a woman who didn't have any sort of father figure in her youth is almost always some cock carousel riding trainwreck. Conversely, this is also why patriarchal religions fuck up girls even worse, since those girls all have a dad that said, "NEVER offer your Vagina for attention or you're going to disappoint dad and also go to HELL," which is a great way to raise a sexually repressed woman with countless anxiety disorders.
