Praxeology of the Dominant Male

Also, soy masculinity

So if you’re new to my content, this is how my newsletter went for the last few years. As I write my third book, Praxeology, volume 2: Dread I send you excerpts. Think of it like watching a comedian perform live, while you wait six months so that you can watch the special on Netflix. What’s been changes, what’s been refined, what’s been left out and what is new?

I’m bringing you along on this slog. Enjoy everything about Dread and the red pilled praxeology that will never fit in a 10 minute video or white claw power hour podcast, but has helped thousands of men over the last decade take back their sexlives and improve/replace their marriage to something far superior.

What would you point to in a marriage to call it successful? What would you call the fail state of either one? What is the goal of a relationship?

Definitions matter

Most people defer to longevity. They have been married for 20 years! Mind you the woman is ornery and embittered, while the man has a distant stare, like he’s checked out. Some people refer to their economic situation. They are such a power couple. They have built a million dollar empire, meanwhile the wife hasn’t been laid in years and the husband is sleeping with whoever validates his work. Other people refer to children, or the output of a relationship. They have a beautiful family, 4 kids and a nice house, meanwhile the husband is seeing prostitutes and the wife is idolizing the children as a buffer against her husbands sexual advances.

The common assumption is that half of marriages end in divorce. That’s not a useful statement because it doesn’t tell the right story. In reality, those divorces were unhappy, but not everyone who is unhappy divorces. I argue that a good half of the marriages left are people living lives of quiet desperation. So of every 4 married couples, 2 are divorced, one is miserable, and only 1 is content with their lives.

Focusing on the symbols ignores the most important thing. Are you proud with your relationship. Are you happy with it more often than not, and is it meeting your needs just as well as it’s meeting hers? The point of this story is to say people are unhappy and refuse to deal with it. People are unhappy and love to convince themselves they aren’t. They make excuses to convince themselves, or coerce their husbands, that they are happy, this is normal, and they should be happy they are on the plantation.

Everything you see and hear today about healthy relationships is wronger than wrong. It’s not helping, it’s only hurting, and the more you look into the history of everything, from marriage counseling to mental health, the more you realize everyone is making money off of the misery of husbands, and to a lesser extent their wives. The solution is simple. It’s not easy but it’s simple. You have to throw away the common sense ways people are dealing with things and become praxeological in your approach.

Goals matter.

The goal of a praxeological man isn’t to enforce values onto the woman in his life. The goal is to secure a sustainable happiness for everyone in that relationship. Man is happy and from that happiness everyone else gains happiness. It’s not a philosophical point, it’s a practical reality that men have learned in our little ad hoc virtual laboratory. Men treated their struggling relationships the same way tinkerers work in their basement on the next invention. They swapped notes, shared stories, and tried to replicate anything that seemed to work. The first step was defining the question:

What do I want?

For almost every man it starts in the same way:

Constant sexual rejections from their wives. That may turn to porn to handle their urges, and when their wives find out they call it emotional cheating. The dude convinces himself he has an addiction, so it’s not his fault. Everyone he asks tells him to try more communication and to do more for her to win her heart back. He tries to communicate and she calls him an asshole. He tries to do more and nothing is ever good enough. She gains weight and makes no attempt to even try to look attractive. She gaslights him by saying most couples stop having sex once they have kids, because kids are special and there’s no time for the relationship. All of this culminates in the one moment that brings everyone to this praxeological framework.

Sitting on the toilet, another sexual rejection, complete desperation. A man types into his phone Why won’t my wife fuck me? And the rabbit hole all starts from there. So don’t worry fellas, you’re not along, in fact you’re among a silent majority of men. Luckily a few men took that underground railroad off the plantation, and learned the tools that men either lost, or never had to begin with.

It’s the Praxeology of the dominant male.

♦♦♦

The praxeological man looks at all the different ways people form relationships. Polyamory, Polygamy, harems, etc. With all the different hierarchies that exist in these relationships, male dominant, monogamous relationships have been the most stable over history. There may be better, but the praxeological man goes with what he knows works.

When women lead relationships, they prioritize what David Clare, author of Practical Female Psychology for the Practical Man calls the betafication process which will be later on in the book. For right now know that the feminine instinct, ideally manifested, is to fall in love with a man, have kids with that man, then fall out of love and repeat. Male dominant relationships trend towards more sustained happiness, men are the more stable ones in relationships while women bring more chaos. Women are generally happier when deferring to a man they can look up to, and men are happier when looking at a woman they can be protective of. So male dominant is what the praxeological man works with.

You may be thinking that this was necessary in the past but not applicable in the modern world. Women didn’t have the strength to hunt in neolithic family units. They didn’t have the strength to farm in agricultural societies. Men were the dominant force in a relationship because women required them to survive. Male productivity was equal to male value. In our modern industrial society, we have automated male strength and so they are able to work in the factories and the offices. This is all correct, but again, it’s not useful. There is nothing about the DNA of women and men who have fundamentally changed. While we are physically in a world where a strong back and a strong arm aren’t required, we still live with a body that requires all the emotional aspects of that life.

You may be thinking that the traditional way of life is the only way it will work and we need to become sexual Luddites and return. Well, because of the industrial revolution we have discovered energy which allowed us to create automation. This automation detached male labor from productivity and has been the greatest change in relationship dynamics in human history. So while a male dominant, monogamous relationship model is the best model we have to work with, the new problem is how do men become the dominant person of the relationship without provision being the way we become dominant?

Modern man has gained real insecurity when facing this question. The concept of masculinity, which was never really a concept before, has become the symbol for men to aspire to. In this section you may notice a lot of things we hold dear are symbolic. This isn’t a good thing. Symbols are now the unhealthy narcissist creates an identity and forces everyone around them to adhere to it. Symbols are abstract, symbols can lie, and symbols hide from us our own well being. They show us what we ought to be instead of what is.

Men are being raised to believe that taking care of and providing for family is the only way for male dominance. Women look at his proclamation of ‘bringing home the bacon’ and realize they can grab bacon for $5 at the grocery store and say:

“What else do you got?”

For the modern sexual marketplace, man has become a disposable commodity and not an essential service. Men not only agree with it, but create a stronger feedback loop for it. Fathers want their daughters to succeed and teach them to be self sustainable and not rely on men. It’s not irrational to raise a daughter to do this either. Office work isn’t as hard as manual labor. Mothers want their daughters to succeed as well and teach them this. The world exists without danger, parents are teaching their daughters to not need a man, so for the praxeological man, whats left?

Since you’re not needed, the only thing left is to be wanted. If man is a commodity, do what commodities do; they learn to brand as luxury goods. People pay 10x what an item is worth for what it signals to the world. They pay 100x what it’s worth for what it says about them. So the praxeological man abandons economic input as the measure for dominance and changes from working at being a better commodity good into luxury branding for the modern man.

Women don’t need a man, but they sure as hell want one! They may need shoes, but they want Louboutins. Instead of food, water, shelter and protection, the currency of the modern realm are things like social clout, emotional stability, relationship comfort the fear of missing out etc.

Intuitively, you already grasp the concept as we all know the difference between a Ferrari and a Civic, an Iphone and an Android, or soybeans and Edemame.

Soy Masculinity

Soybeans are the analogy for modern man. In a world of 8 billion people, first world abundance, and the only threats on our lives being self inflicted ones (obesity, smoking, suicide e.g.) we have never been luckier, or more disposable. But what does the soybean have to do with a man in 2023?